Author: Nusrat Sohail
​
Parenting in America as a first generation Pakistani immigrant isn’t easy and unfortunately there are no set examples to follow. We are all pioneers who are learning through experimenting this with what we knew. Our knowledge of parenting has come down to us through what our own elders who raised us in a place which is seven seas away. We come to this land of opportunities but not knowing what difficulties lies ahead of us when we raise our children here. We try our best to give the values that we have learned. But the values learned in another part of the world might still be valid but imparting them in a new culture is completely different. There are many things that I have learned while raising children and one thing I would like to highlight is learning the culture through learning mother-tongue is immensely important.

When we were younger our parents tried hard for us to learn English as it is considered language of educated people and career growth was attached with it in Pakistan. We learned Urdu while living there and not much importance was placed upon it. However it is completely opposite here and children learn English anyways but if emphasis of Urdu learning isn’t placed then they loose the concept of identity. There are gaps in cultural understanding within the household between first and second generation and often children feel a loss of identity when the language and cultural understanding isn’t there. My recommendation for new parents is to try to connect your children with Urdu and it automatically connects them with their culture and identity.